I’ve always been a talker. Sure I’ll have nothing to say from time to time but usually I’m just sticking my foot in my mouth. Ever since I was a kid I have been longwinded. Rightfully or wrongfully, I have a set of iron lungs that just keep spewing dialogue like I know what I’m saying. It’s been that way for a long time and over the years has been pointed out. It’s a pretty common joke in my life and a genuine sentiment that I enjoy good conversation. Sometimes any conversation is nice too. Well, sometimes.
Typically it’s questioned though if I’m not chatting up a light storm about this or that. Since I’m not one to be too quiet especially when something is wrong. Well again, sometimes. Actually I dated a guy who when breaking up with me said the reason being was that I didn’t talk enough. Which was funny at the time but funnier telling my family and friends about it since the story took about twenty minutes to tell.
Every now and then I look forward to the silence. It’s a pretty busy world out there and we often get lost in the shuffle. At least, I get lost. Even though I’m not sharing my misguided adventure with you that’s all I can think about. Spinning my wheels like I think I’m actually going somewhere. It’s hard to get out of that. It’s hard to interrupt a conversation to collect your thoughts. To slow down and assess the situation to see that oh shit, yeah we’re stuck. To see things as they exist and go oh yeah, we’re still stuck but it’s not so bad because we know we’re stuck. Which doesn’t always mean you’re in the same place time after time. You’re not going anywhere if you’re just spinning your wheels looking for a way out. You’re not saying anything if you keep chasing your thoughts with words.
Something I heard when I was growing up was to “pay attention to your commas.” Take a break and look at what you’re saying, at what you’re doing. Pause for a moment and think about where you want to go with this. Not all sentences make sense, not all paragraphs have substance, and not all thoughts are finished but it all creates a story. It’s all apart of the great book of life that each one of has a chapter in. Maybe I talk too much but that’s the way I am and how I like to be. Chatty and sarcastic with a little bit of sass that masks my insecurity just right.
So as I bustle through, lost and in the mood for conversation, I try to pay attention to my commas because we are after all writing a story.